I have a friend who means a lot to me. When he betrayed me last last month it became really devastating! It was really heartbreaking at that time that I can't even get mad at him initially! But as the weeks came by I suddenly had the urge to just forget about it and move on and to even finally take his sorry and just forgive him. Maybe I did just that. And don't get me wrong! I am not the type of person to forgive and forget easily, I'm having exceptions because he is, as I said, someone special and weigh too much on my heart. Having friends, real one, is a rare thing for me that's why I only open up my problems to people that I knew for a long time already! Sometimes I am perceive to be snobby or afloat when I don't tell my secrets or stories to my other friends, but they just don't get that I'm still weighing it if I could really trust them with my LIFE.
I'm a person who doesn't trust much easily. I'm so scared of being let down that it takes me months to weigh if I could trust you before even letting you take a peek on my past life. Sometimes I don't even let you take a peek at all. But don't get me wrong! I'm still your friend and you're still mine. But some secrets are better off said to a few than all. Believe me that's more convenient than to tell the whole town your deep thoughts, actions or secrets! It's like you want to be famous or something if you want everyone to know everything about you!
Now, why the hell am I writing this if I don't want you knowing my thoughts? Well, I'm writing this because I want to be understood! I want to be perceive differently and I want YOU to be my friend that I could trust. Since I'm partly online most of the time, I just wanted new friends from outside my circle to talk to and to not be judge because of what others might have said about me to you. People should understand that what happens in the past should not be the definition of that person in the future, it should only be the learning experience to be kept. Because everyone change including me and you.
How about you? What are your deepest thoughts? Have a nice week!
Xo, Lei
No comments:
Post a Comment